It’s not confirmed, and there’s no way to confirm this because he’s dead, but it is believed that Dr. Seuss based Whoville on Amalfi. When I say “it is believed”, I mean I believe that.

After sleeping under the vines, I decided it’d be important to find somewhere less exposed (to the morning sun) to sleep. The beach (coming soon) of Amalfi is very, very busy, so I knew I wouldn’t get away with sneaking in somewhere around there. I also thought it would take forever for the police to drive the winding, treacherous cliff streets. So, I ventured up the mountain (and it is a mountain) to “squat” or “break and enter” or “home invade”, however you want to put it.

But when I was at those heights, I could see just how insane Amalfi is with its strange architecture. I also could see that the roads were basically continual U-turns and wondered how many people died flying off the cliff into the sea. Good luck getting the fuzz up here in time to catch the perp who pushed the guy.

Just to be clear, I ain’t never done pushed no one.

I know what you’re thinking and it’s exactly what I thought too. “Mmmm, I could really have a nice long nap on those marble steps.”

At this point I had trekked (that’s what they call walking or hiking when you’re travelling) up the side of a cliff. Combine that with having the sun wake up up WAY too early, I needed an almost afternoon nap BADLY!

Look at this mass of houses. If one were to, say, call the cops for help because someone was, I don’t know, shooting up an alley or, more likely, sleeping on their marble steps, how on earth would they find the house? I mean, really! They’re built on top of each other, right?

And what are they trying to do, match the cliff in the background with the houses?! LOL!

And if someone threatened to call the pigs on you, and you threw them out one of the windows on the side of the house there, they’d just keep falling and falling and falling. LMAO!

Photography, thank you for allowing me to capture the beautiful insanity of Amalfi. And through you, let me remember that beauty doesn’t have to make sense.

I’m not sure if priests are just used to their congregations falling asleep on pews, but I was not bothered when I finally ventured into this church to take a snooze. I think the pew was even more comfortable than they marble step would’ve been. And there was no ornate gate to climb. And no scared homeowner to toss out a window.

None of this had anything to do with me high-tailing it out of there and laying low in some other Italian city. But I didn’t leave just yet…